Finding my Way

Just got off a long day of work. I read something interesting today on my break at dinner, which by the way I am very angry at myself for purchasing. I could have packed a sack lunch and saved $11, but my tummy insisted on getting Panera, so I did. I got myself a salad, a drink (could've saved money and gotten water), and a cookie (which I didn't really need). I really am not doing well with this whole saving money thing.

Back to what I read, I mentioned before that I am in the middle of reading The Happiness Project. The March chapter is about aiming higher in work, life, etc. The chapter starts out saying that "happiness is a critical factor for work, and work is a critical factor for happiness." Basically, the happier you are, the better you do at work and the higher of a position you can attain; thus, more money. It also talked about how those who work more are happier people. Because they put their all into their work and use every effort in everything that they do, they are happier people in general. Now, it's not my choice to work 35 hours a week while I'm a full-time student in school, but I have found myself to be a bit more content in the times that I am working more. I believe that this is because I tend to forget about the stresses of life while I am at work. The more spare time I have, the more time I have to sit and be unhappy with how life is going. I have found this to be true countless times.

Even though I wish I had more free time, I am happy to be able to forget about life when I do work. Throughout this whole experience I am starting to encounter with needing to save money, I am learning just how hard it really is for me. My roommate told me to my face awhile back that I am an impulse spender. It was a harsh thing for me to hear, but it is so true and it's what I needed to hear. In the past, I have spent just about every bit of my paychecks on things I don't need. All that left me with was no money and no room in my closet. I am beginning to downsize, but it is hard for me not to spend.

I am running a half marathon with my sister this upcoming spring, and I need to begin training for that. So what's my first thought? Go buy workout clothes. And I did. Well, I put some on hold that I am still debating whether or not I should get. I have myself convinced that by purchasing those clothes, I will be more motivated to actually workout. It's the same thought process as with many other things: Homecoming means looking pretty, right? So go buy a new, expensive dress that you will probably only wear once. I know this to be true, yet I can't get myself to stop buying things. I already bought one pair of yoga pants, and I have 8 more items on hold. I really need to figure out how to hold back in times like this. I am making progress, though.

Tonight after work, I really wanted a milkshake so I almost got one. But when I thought about it, I realized I didn't really need it so I ended up coming home and just enjoying a nice cup of hot chocolate. Progress. It comes slowly, but I am finding my way.

~Christy